Tuesday, January 29, 2008

the only thing drinking ever fixed...

...was nothing!

A brief bedtime message from Sober Girl.

Monday, January 28, 2008

steps one and two

In my last post I just talked about step three - that's because I was so impressed with that analogy the presenter gave about turning things over to God's care being like turning your money over to the care of a financial adviser/broker.

The first two steps are, of course, important. Can't get to three if you don't work one and two!

I'm a strong believer in working the steps in order. Exceptions can be made with the 10th step, although I think that people in early sobriety should always check with their sponsors before marching off to make amends. We get so anxious to fix everything!

So of course, step one is so powerful: Not only are we admitting the nature of the problem (powerlessness)and the outcome of that problem (unmanageable lives), but that ever-important "we" is right up at the top.

Lest you should forget that you are not alone, just look at the first step! WE are powerless over alcohol; OUR lives had become unmanageable.

Step two, "came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity," has been taken the wrong way by many an alcoholic, I think. As one of the conference presenters said, "What? You're implying that I'm INSANE!" Well, yeah.. and what's more, even a quick glance at one's life (rather than the searching and moral inventory required later) will show insanity.

My boss is calling for me, so I must cut this short.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

over to the care of god - as I understand him

I was at a conference recently and attended a panel discussion of steps one through six. The three presenters did an incredible job of all 6 steps, but what I keep thinking about is step three: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."

What I liked about the presenter's perspective is this: He compared putting one's will and life into the care of a higher power to putting one's finances into the care of a broker. The broker takes your money and works on your behalf to make your money grow.

The presenter asked, "Now that the broker has the money, is it HIS money? Or is it still your money?"

The audience hummed with, "My money!"

The presenter continued, "So if you take that same idea, but instead of money, make it your will and your life and instead of a broker, make it your higher power, it's the same thing: Whose life is it? Whose will?"

Again the audience agreed, "My life! My will!"

He said, "Exactly! God isn't TAKING your life and will, he's just taking care of it; he's investing, saving, making sure it's well cared-for."

And that was just the best twist on that step. As someone who has sponsored a baker's dozen of women over the years, I've had to respond to newcomers who are afraid of this step.

"What if God decides to make me a scientist? I'm awful at science!" they'd cry.

But God (or the higher power, your higher power, or whatever it is you call it) isn't interested, I don't think, in using us as circus acts; I think God is more interested in using us to help each other.

And if it's only that I feel better thinking that and in the end there's absolutely nothing "out there," so be it. My life will have been better spent -and my heart will have felt more content- believing that.

first sober post

This is the first sober post, but not my first-ever sober post. I've been sober for 11 years, so it's not a new deal. The purpose of this blog is to provide (myself) a place to share thoughts (maybe even experience, strength and hope) anonymously.

So here we go... just wanted to get it started. More from me later!

-SG